do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Randomize
