It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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