So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
