A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
