Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
