Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Randomize
