Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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