about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
