Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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