talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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