I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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