He is such a slut. More and more my type.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize