party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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