I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
How external is "for external use only"?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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