Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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