And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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