white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
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