just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
