question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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