you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
