once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
