some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize