My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
did i walk over a car last night?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize
