We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
