and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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