Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
