on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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