Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
