so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I need moral support for this bender
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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