i just had sex bonerless
Actions speak louder than pants.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
