Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
