i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
