Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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