actually, I'm a sock model
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
