do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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