so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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