You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize