Little spoons don't ask big questions
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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