Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
