He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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