the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
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