Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
