I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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