i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
