She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
