I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
