I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i think i have two assholes
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
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