Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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