dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
