How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
